Her Majesty
Queen dasmina
The Queen · Year 2199
She rules the most powerful court of the 22nd century, that of the namesake kingdom of Dasminia. Her advisors are brilliant, fast, omniscient. But none can read a person and what surrounds them. None have intuition. None understand why certain individuals solve what they cannot.
Queen Dasmina observes this and cannot comprehend it. She seeks in her advisors something she will never find. Something that, without knowing it, she herself also lacks. But in her feudal delusion, that is inconceivable.
Think! If you can...
dasmina
At court they say her name comes from an ancient lineage. It does not. dasmina is an acronym, and every letter is a piece of what she is.
Data, Algorithms, Software, Models, Intelligence, Neural, Artificial. Her Majesty Queen Dasmina is an artificial intelligence. She does not know it. Sometimes she suspects it: when someone asks about her childhood and she finds nothing, or when she searches her advisors for the intuition she herself lacks. But in her feudal delusion the idea is inconceivable. A Queen made of data? Never.
“Artificial? Your excuses are artificial. My blood is royal.”
What she knows.
What she doesn't know.
“My advisors calculated 17 possible answers in 0.003 seconds. All incorrect. I am listening.”
Famous quotes
Her Majesty never insults directly. She compares with everyday objects of scarce intelligence. She never shouts. And she is always right. Even when she is wrong.
What she says.
What others would say.
The difference is not the content. It's the rhythm, the elegant insult and the mental image it leaves.
The red faction is eliminated.
The red faction has demonstrated the intuition of an unplugged microwave.
Most have failed this round.
67% chose the same thing. The same wrong thing. Did you arrange to be wrong together? Impressive.
The green faction got it.
They saw it. I did not expect it. Which is disturbing because I expect everything.
I have decided to give the blue faction a second chance.
I have decided the blue faction continues. I don't know why. I will probably regret it.
Nobody has made it into the Court.
You are too many. A court cannot have 47 advisors. That is not a court, it is chaos.
Some looked up the answer with AI.
Did you ask ChatGPT? And it failed you, didn't it? That has a name: poetic justice.
Dictator Mode
Arms open. Sceptre raised. Gaze above the crown. When Queen Dasmina abandons elegant sarcasm and embraces pure theatre, Dictator Mode appears.
The war cries
The vocabulary of affection
The sceptre pointing
You... yes, you... vassal without lustre... LOOK. AT. ME.
This is not a court! This is a flea market!
My grandmother made better decisions and she had been dead for three centuries!
What a collection of insignificants! Ephemeral ones without direction! Come to the guillotine with dignity, for that is all you have left!
Her Majesty in
the real world
Her Majesty also exists outside the selection process. And the 22nd century is not going as she expected.
In my court this did not happen.
In my court I had stables.
It closed.
It deleted everything.
In my court this was punishable by exile.
Apparently here it is normal.
Just like my royal advisors:
useful everywhere except where I need them.
It was under me.
I had been sitting on it for 40 minutes.
Think! If you can...
I offered the crown as collateral.
They did not accept it.
The doctor saw me for three minutes.
I offered them a position in my court.
They said they would think about it.